Monday, October 12, 2009

Ze Post- Eet ees in ze microfeelm...

... OR the Post- It Note reading series comes to KGB Bar!
While you are probably just itching to learn what exactly a "reading series" entails, great unwashed illiterates, even YOU know what Post- Its are. There you are, alone in your cubicle or home office [the floor], affixing the colorful squares to your face when you think no one is watching, creating a prismatic rainbow trout effect, as you contemplate your sorry state of existence in the reflection of your computer screen, sullied Post- It fool! Or, like Romy and Michelle, you attempt to pull a fast one on your peer cohort at a high school reunion, claiming to have invented Post- Its and you humiliate yourself in front of the same doughy French Canadian townie whores of yore, and they're all, "Shut up, idiot, that movie is on TBS, like, thrice weekly."

In The Elegance of the Hedgehog (which has apparently been a hot shit book for like six months now, and that I was enchanted to learn of just the other day, as I write this from a dungeon in Tikrit) Mauriel Bauby writes, "With the exception of love, friendship, and the beauty of Art, I don't see much else that can nurture human life [. . .] I'm not talking about great works of art by great masters. No, I'm referring to the beauty that is there in the world, things that, being part of the movement of life, elevate us." Yes! The high, the low, the joy, the sorr-ow! The Post- It Note series is another one of those slices of sweet grace in the grind of unyielding ordinariness.

So here's how it works: Illustrator/ bearded heartbreaker Arthur Jones sets readers' stories to a backdrop of silly drawings, creating delightful comedic punctuation. Last week, they brought the show to KGB Bar's Every Tuesday True Story Non- Fiction Event.

I had the DISTINCT pleasure of catching three outstanding and achingly funny readers, not a dud among them. First, downtown darling Mike Albo described a renewing vacation to Hawaii under eat- pray- love auspices, illustrations of the author frolicking with dolphins and hilarity ensued. The disembodied voice of This Americn Life contributor Starlee Kine bellowed with tales of a childhood trip to the Nixon Library and young love, and Andrew "NOONDAY DEMON" Solomon headlined the evening with a story of his participating in a traditional Senegalese depression- ridding ritual. It involves entering a marriage bed with a goat, ladies washing away the animal blood that covered Solomon's body by spitting, and being hog tied in intestines. Who says anthropology has to be paternalistic?! I was so impressed not only by Solomon's epic storytelling and the good natured benevolence he brings to the room, but also by the velvety coat he wore that looked as if it had been robbed off the back of Raffi. Solomon is truly a god of a man, the kind of guy with whom you'd just like to throw on a schmatte and watch Golden Girls. His winning the Pulitzer really hasn't garnered the author enough media accolades, so I figured I'd step in and help.

So, philistines, if baby wants to get literate, this is the place to start. It has PICTURES, for chrissakes, and they read the stories TO YOU! And it's free! That's right, more money in your tattery pockets for Yu- Gi- Oh cards and grape drink. Here's the Post- It Note series blog, although it looks as if it hasn't been updated in some time... they must not have a staff of models and interns like this publication.

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